Patiently Waiting...

I guess the start of a pregnancy is mostly about waiting patiently...waiting for that first double line, waiting for that first doctor's appointment, waiting for the first signs and symptoms, waiting for that indicative bulge of a mother-in-waiting, waiting for that first movement...

I have been waiting a long 8 days for my real first doctor's appointment where they will tell me the viability of my little one that has attached itself in my womb. Tomorrow morning will be the check up day where they will tell me things are looking good or if I should prepare for something else. I have a good feeling about tomorrow, but there is always that little bit of anxiety, you know? With the first, I didn't get to see my little "bean" before she had already sprouted arms and legs and kicking frantically in my belly. It was the most amazing sight. I am glad that this go around, I am able to see her from her egg form stuck inside my womb like a little speck...but it does add some anxiety.

My waist has already started to expand and my clothes are already fitting tightly. This is not a good sign. The sensitivity of the nose has not gotten worse, but I do smell specific things very strongly...although it doesn't really affect me negatively. My starting weight with Tay was 140 and I almost hit 200 pounds with her, so I hope that doesn't happen again. My starting weight now is 138, so my target weight will be 170. Let's not shoot for 200 again...that was just not pleasant.

As for other symptoms, I think my hormones are definitely in flux because I have been very snappy and emotionally reactive to Jeff and Tay recently. Having Han here and all the issues going on with that have also been weighing on my mind, so that hasn't helped my emotional state. I haven't had any crying breakdowns or anything, but I am definitely getting my feelings hurt over small things...I need to relax and let it go.

It is already getting a bit harder to hold and carry Tay around. I think it's just the exhaustion that comes in early pregnancy...but man...she's around 30 pounds already, so how much longer will I be able to carry her around? I really need to read up on how to make her feel secure in our love so that she loves her soon-to-be little sibling...

I wonder if it will be a boy or a girl? I think a girl...